♥3 more days to go is CNY ♥

Yesterday my eye still red n sore

Today morning wake up is getting damn worse lol
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Since precious is taking his nap
so i update abit..
Have done finish my housechores
My sore eye is getting slightly better if the afternoon..Someone comments my eye look like 水汪汪
Some even comment my eye look like cry alot of days..
Was blessed i alright now
and thank god mikkiel never spread by me...♥someone bought me this two books and claim is for my valentine day present..♥
I had been many years didn't read this type of book
Very long never received valentine day present
BUT WE ARE NOT COUPLE
at all..
whatever i thank everyone who bought this for me or my 2 precious for this RABBIT year
really appreciated =)
感恩=)

Had wrote this letter for the debtor who come up
gonna paste on my door
But i dun know how to write in chinese
gonna ask someone who can translate for me..

Valentine Day is coming
luckily i have my
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.
.
one look so SWEETONE LOOK SO CUTE

2 precious to accompany me ..=)

Tomorrow hope will not rain so i can go Tanjong Pagar to give some document to
the officer...*Pray*

What A SORE EYE day

Yesterday as usual brought 2 precious to sch n went to work,
went to the ladies found out my right eye is abit red so didn't dare to rub my eye..
Keep asking my colleagues my eye is getting worse and still RED..
After work the rain pour like nobody business,
I brought my umbrella back
So finally went to polyclinic to see a doctor.
Gotten a referral letter will be going JMC next week..
I pray will not cost a bomb..

Seriously i afraid i am blind cos
this few years was always having sore eye on and off
and had waste a lot of capacity of tears
Tear too much
was also will not good for eyes too..
Especially those despicable people hangin around us
and act as and when..

Today morning wake up and 7 plus

eye become like this
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than evening time is getting more worse
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Night time my both eye is become SORE
Pray i will recover soon
cos monday i going down to many places to
settle alot of matters..My precious was with me,and baobei is with my parent house
I have no choice cos i dun want them to get infected
let my parent to help me to look after baobei..
I will look after ACTIVE precious..
Teacher say mikkiel is starting to talk
feel so happy
and
sarah is usual
behaved well in School..

Many of the people is asking me this question:
when i was in the URA BUILDING
when i was in the cab and the driver was also a single mum
10 out 8 their partner is also A GAMBLER..
为何孩子的爸爸要这样做
两个孩子都很可爱
难到不会担心
孩子的成长吗..
Didn't know i to answer
but selfish is the words in my mind
Everyone living in a different environment
SO
two become together
either have to compromised
or
be responsible in own position
or
Counselling & family support is very important
and beware the things might be happen..

Not every gambler is BAD
JUST THAT I AM TO BLAME
TOO NAIVE THAT
EVERYTHING WILL BE WELL
BECAUSE OF THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN..




CNY is another few more days
3 of us sure will be very =)..

An advanced
恭喜发财
兔年
每个人
健康成长
开开心心
财源滚滚而来.....

谢谢大家的关心,
我和孩子都很好,
thank those i dun know who e-mail me
who send sms to me
who call me
who come up and look for us
We are alright
and
i believe we will be better
if those people who is related to the MAN
just go to the right place to go find him..
A real MAN will go settle not using their mouth
is action
and will not cause trouble to let A WOMAN TO CLEAR THE MESS
THAT FAMILY MAN IS VERY CAPABLE
IN DOING THIS..
JUST HOPE I CAN REALLY FASTER SETTLE THE ADDRESS THINGY
AND I THINK IT WILL BE SETTLE..

谢谢大家我们会过的很好的.....

知足是幸福

多少人在今天見不到明天的太陽，多少人在今天已成了殘疾。
多少人在今天要面對饑荒，多少人在今天已失去了家。
還活著是種幸福，有健康是份禮物。飽暖時要懂知足，有家歸應感滿足。
要知足才會幸福，會隨緣路更好走。順境時不起貪念，逆境時不起憎恚。
多少人在今天見不到明天的太陽，多少人在今天已成了殘疾。
多少人在今天要面對饑荒，多少人在今天已失去了家。
人生本來就是苦，不知足只會增加痛苦。最後總會發現，原來平凡就是幸福。
還活著是種幸福，有健康是份禮物。飽暖時要懂知足，有家歸應感滿足。
要知足才會幸福，會隨緣路更好走。果報現隨遇而安，種善果念彌陀。
知足就是幸福。

Cny is coming,

Monday,I brought 2 precious to school and came back and cleaning here and there to prepared for CNY ..
I going to re-shuffle the furniture and had dump alot of things out of the house and i will replace some of the furniture when i clear all my DEBTS and is start to changes every little things in MY HOME SWEET HOME..

Today morning brought 2 precious to school as usual
Baobei taking off didi's shoes
(so sweet)

2 precious go to school
and off back..
(something happen lazy to mention)

Get ready myself in the afternoon,off i go to URA BUILDING for WHAT..
To do some MATTER
HOPE I CAN CHANGE MY STATUS
AND FROM FEBRUARY
I HAVE TO FIND A FULL TIME JOB
AND I WANT TO GET BACK THE OTHER SHARE OF THIS HOUSE
AND 3 of US
CAN HAVE OUR OWN SHELTER..

my decision had make
I dun need that type of people
staying with me and
only know how to say
whatever using his MOUTH
I just want him to return me what he own me
I dun want a single cent less or more..
I just want the exact he own..


(The Happy 3 of us)
work hard and clear the debt
and give my 2 precious n my family
a better life =)


CNY is coming i bought two shoes for my 2 precious
although i had not much $$$$$
I might not buying any new clothes for myself
but i will not let my children to be suffer..
i thank for friends n relatives who
give me their support
no matter is only a care & concern
or helping in $$$$ matter..

Sorry to delay all my debt
JUST BECAUSE OF U
i feel so bad to face my friend n relatives
BUT i knew they understand =)

兔年要来了
我要每天开开心心
赚多多钱
把一切快点解决....
重新做个快乐的妈妈
和
一个不要在让我父母
担心的孩子...

=)

Thank everyone care & concern
we are happy everyday
after 2 precious & I is together
EVERYDAY =)

Never expected Dramatic life is falling on me
every hug care n concern
I am really appreciated
finding $$$$$ everywhere
i knew this is not the way
but this temporary....
I have both hand and leg
should work hard for abetter life
n clear my debt
and
Give my 2 precious
A better and happy life
every single day......

2 PRECIOUS ( TEMPORARY SEPRATED)

Poor 2 precious had to be separated
cos my left leg have a total of three injury..
Will be going OP @ march..
Will be going for personal counselling this thursday
have to search for the place
not very familiar in the west..

Dun worry
i will be fine
i will take care of the children well..
Hope sarah rashes can be recover..
Poor gal have to follow me to work for 5 hours
Her daddy claim he is working
is with his daddy and never get a single cents
and dun want to look after his daughter claim
he dotes her alot..

my beloved grandma passed away 11082010
i am very very sad
i still cannot accept the fact
i haven't even cool myself down
i haven't even take a deep BREATHE
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I think is september
LOAN SHARK COME AND WRITE
ON THE WALL OUTSIDE
.
.
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Paint slashed on my RED DOOR
and mikkiel had step on the paint on his LEFT FOOT
and that day i CHASED THAT FATHER AWAY

the police report
(2009-2010)The same things
HARASSED DEBTOR
and forget to add 1 innocent adult n 2 children..

END OF the mid year
i did tell him
pls him beg him
GIVE THE 3 of us A PEACE LIFE
HE EVEN KNEW MY MOTHER IS GOING TO OPERATION
AND HE KNEW MY FATHER HAD CANCER LONG TIME AGO
WILL YOU BEAR TO TO LET THEM WORRY ANOT
OR YOU WANT TO HAVE A BETTER LIFE
.
,
,
,
,
,
THIS IS THE PRESENT FOR ME
.
,
when i got all this,smell to much thinner and paints
and all this stuff
i get sick
BY ALL THE PRESENT I RECEIVED
I ALMOST DEAD
AND
I HAD TO ACCEPT WHAT HE DID
IS NOT EASY
I 'm a HUMAN TOO
THE CHILDREN DUN DESERVE THIS TYPE OF TREATING
WE ARE INNOCENT
IF I REALLY DIED
who going to take care of my 2 precious
.
.
.
.
.
THINGS HAD NOT END YET
;
;
;
;
;

The latest PRIVATE LOANER
(A FATHER OF 2 precious)
Very nice to do so
what will u feel
when u have a so called husband like this..??????
AND SOMEHOW
the children have a daddy like this
>>
I am a human
tell me who can take this
and i dun even force him to go borrow
and
I SWEAR I NEVER GET A SINGLE CENT ALSO...

Somehow i am falling tired of all this bloody problem that caused by this father of the children.. 2009 loan shark harassment had been nearly made me crazy 2010 again the same things is happening LOAN SHARK CASES AGAIN end of the year find out he go borrow money from PRIVATE LOANER the START of 2011 12012011(today) Private loaner came up... I am waiting more to come up and do whatever they wants this irresponsible MAN throw everything behind to let me CLEAR HIS MESS amd BEG ME TO HELP HIM TO BORROW 5k for him.. HE CAPABLE TO BEG when he HAVING DEBTS IF I HAVE 5K myself,i will bring my kids and run out this HELL, end up telling me if they come up and splash paint or what He think used this way to tell me i will go and help him to borrow around..I not yesterday just born i had enough of this, i now open the door to wait them to come and do what they want...AND WHEN COME TO FAMILY ,WHEN I HAVENT START TO GO OUT AND WORK AND I AM STAYING AT HOME BEING A HOUSEWIFE LOOKING AFTER CHILDREN>>>i have to worry family expenses even though i am not working till now I HAVE TO ASK FOR MY FRIEND,RELATIVES FOR HELP AND TOTAL THIS FOUR YEARS total IS 4k+++..
(BORROW , RETURN , Borrow, RETURN)
WHo want to live this TYPE OF LIFE...

CNY YEAR IS ROUND THE CORNER
I HAD TO DRAG MYSELF TO SUFFER ALL THIS
AND MY PARENT IS OF COURSE
WORRY ABOUT THE 3 of US..
I know my parent is sick
so i doesn't want them to know since my grandma passed away
they are feeling very down
all thank to HIM AGAIN...

I am trying my very best to to GET WELL and DRAG MYSELF TO WORK EVEN HOW PAIN HOW SICK.. Although i put my precious in his parent or his care doesn't mean i dun want him.. Teacher call me at 19,01 the childcare end at 1900 I eventually had brought sarah back home, I never been late to brought my 2 precious home before HE BROKE THE RECORD.. I worry about him whether he got eat well,sleep well ,drink well whether is he happy at the home anot... Everyday i brought sarah home i like missing of something the feeling is so :(..

Mummy ask me not to cry so much wait u blind than u know..

How can i dun cry
can someone teach me..
i try to
but i really cannot..

My brain cannot stop
thinking
when my house will be burn by those LOAN SHARK when i can bring mikkiel and sarah back together like the past when when everything will be a stop..

I dun like people keep helping me
i will feel uneasy
but when i need help
10 out 5 will help me
I am very grateful
but owning someone a favour
also not good.
when u can help if they got problem
is ok
the problem is when they need help
i cannot help
i feel very very bad
this is the problem..

I can do is to work hard earn more money
but
IF THIS PROBLEM IS GOING ON AND ON
Loan shark
or whatever shark
I MIGHT TURN TO A CCRAAZY WOMAN
OR
SLEEPING IN THE COFFIN..

I ALSO DUN KNOW WHY CAN I SURVIVE TO NOW AND CAN EVEN UPDATED I TREASURE MY LIFE BUT SOMETIME A MACHINE ALSO WILL BREAKDOWN DUN SAY A HUMAN BEING..

How can i dun bother & worry THIS HOUSE I AM NOW IN .....IS ALSO MINE -HALF..

Will work hard for my 2 precious
and give them a better life...
Temporary they will be separated
all thank to their father who never work
so i must still work
for them..
I will be looking after sarah
and their father look after mikkiel..
When i saw sarah n didn't see mikkiel
Tear drops
BUT I KNOW IS TEMPORARY
HAVE TO WORK HARD
AND EVEN HARDER...

Will not be able to be in the computer long
like last time
but because of my 2 precious
What i can do for them
I will try my very best..
As everyday
They are happy
I will happy
Parent healthy and happy
i will also happy..

A lonely Sunday

My thight is getting worst and I wanted to bring My precious back from her father house..I cannot even walk properly and he say He ask sarah u want to go home find mummy,and she say DUN WANT..I feel sad and disappointed..Her father didn't even correct her,whatever will never thank him for looking after my 2 precious..

He can even sms me that He want to end his life cos he cannot pay all his debt..So the irresponsible HIM is going to push all the debt to me..Good.See how a man he is..

Dun really enjoy my sunday,Want to be strong but seem like it getting harder,Why there is NOONE can understand ???????????????????????????

A happy saturday

My lunch & dinner

Trotter without vinger cooked by Huiling

My home cooked Curry Vegatble
teach by Huiling

Early in the morning went market with Huiling,buy the vinegar trotter & my first home cooked curry vegetables ingredients..Very long never step into market 12345days although my leg is still pain and weak..I also have do somethings to thank for my colleagues who care and concern,my sickness and everything.

We prepared and cooked didn't take much photo as usual..Huiling cooked for the colleagues and me trotter without vinegar..Have this two dishes for lunch and dinner..=)

Was alone for five days without my 2 precious,miss them so much,have really all my plan and go for it..=)

Sorry will never end to a GAMBLER & A LIAR

Agree what the above quotes mean..

This is what i am doing now for my 2 precious and I:

Heal the past
Live the present
&
Plan for our futureIt have to give up and see the better future

I am doing everyday=)

I am hardly smile
My brain is full of things
no matter i am working
or even at home alone..

I was sick for a month plus,
Had been a fews day didn't go to work
I want to be responsible
But sometime the matter happen at home
just dun let me relieved to go to work..
I ask myself
Why happen to me and my children..
I had because of the children
i decide to give him a chance
he beg for the chance
but than
after all
He had waste my chance on him
I almost breakdown
I am almost died everyday
But those who know what happen to me
Call,sms and even come out my house
to save me..
I am really tired
I really gone crazy
I really want to kill myself
Cos i have enough of the loan shark harassment
and
the doings what this man is doing
Gamble make him full of debts
His doings make me going crazy..
Blame myself to give him a chance
to harm myself to no way..

Either than saying sorry or
saying if heaven wanted to give a chance
and help him with the debt
He will never gamble
(Will never listen to his words anymore)
He ever bought a 4d ticket
telling me he will change
(i'm not a fool anymore)
If he want to make himself useless
go ahead
Dun need to drag me in to this troubles..
Since he never respect i'm the half owner of this house
what should i..

Please stop telling me sorry
I going to vomit out..

When i see him i feel have the urge to give him two tight slap
One for my children
One for parent

He dun even get grateful
He harm me in nowhere
I didn't take any cents of that
I make sure he pay for what i had suffer
he even want to drag my parent down who
both is badly sick..
he jolly well know
How nice my parent treat him
All thank to his all this
I wish him all the best down the road..

I am also dun feel good to digest what he had make this family to be
he dun even afford to get a things for his children
Hope he can spent time with 2 precious
when now i am recovering my old injury on my left leg..

I will not be grateful to him
cos he cause it
i will never..

everyday i miss my 2 precious
i will not ask him to bring 2 precious back
cos i dun even want to see his fcuk face anymore
i hate him
I really hate him
His doing let the school friend to laugh at my children
that i dun know how my children feeling
will be..

The father reaction is to find out the parent
and bash them out..

I dun feel anything from him to done so much things
Saying sorry
doing whatever also no use..
U break the family into pieces with ur both hands
how to glue is also will never
be back as
4 of us anymore..

I doesn't want to be a COPYCAT
like you
who always copy people
and than regret..
-!-

You think i love to post it here
You jolly well i am never hiding anything
this is my blog
what can u do
ASK LOAN SHARK TO BURN MY BLOG
OR WHAT BETTER THING U CAN DO..

A decision make feel so happy =)

Finally i make a decision
Going to find a full time job
and a part time job
(from monday till friday)...=)

Work for the ones who i treasure
I love
I care
thank for the children 's father who done so much things to this house
and run away to his parent house..
You're smart
I also not stupid..
I will pay for what i need to pay
FOR U i will calculate how u need to pay for
my friends and relative and family
help this family..

Nonono You don't ever come and find who and cry and beg for this marriage anymore
Heart died
Dun ever come and compare a aman
who i think not a man
and
tell me
PLEASE GIVE ME A CHANCE..
Since the day i chase him out of the house
I start to have a bit of luck
Monday i strive toto $30
Tuesday loan shark come to the lift and write
O$P$
Wednesday went over to take my medical report
not everything is well
But after all my health is alright =)