做到这个家不像家的人是你
喜欢就求就哭

就喜欢把你家的事
牵累到无辜的人

我很累
累累累,
我已经很尽力去不想
可是我还是不能做好
谁能救....

My 2 precious progress report mean is end of the year..
Saw my precious improving ask me to work hard is worth it de lol..

Recent me..
Nowadays clnic & medicine is just like best friend and favourite place..
I thank all my darling friends and sistas
I thank friends who is busy working
but still remember me
and give me a shower of care of care..

As The father of the children is only doing the responsible
for 2 precious..
Cause he say he loved the children
So now i will observe how he loved the children
by getting late to bring them to school ..

When one of my friend ask him to return what she help me for this family
he even say want to go to her house to return her..
Whatever la
(acting like a what)
make sure he return.
(serve him rights)
(finally he feel the taste of what his friend is doing to me)

@ parent house for 1 day stay(last week)

Sarah still staying at my parent house for a week stay
We (didi+me)miss her alot everyday we will chat on the phone..
Mummy still sick ,still want to help me look after sarah
We quarrel on sunday but of course we are alright now..

When my kids in in my mummy care i also always worry-free..
But mummy is getting old and now still sick
I really hope mummy will alright soon =)

Mummy was very happy sarah know how to say my whole family names..
My mummy was so happy cos she teach her..
She is 满足满足满足咯....

Above picture ====> Evening mummy and i brought them to playground..

Finally sarah is recovered from her fever..
thank god..
Waiting for daddy to come fetch the 3 of us =)

The father of 2 precious
did such a shame things..
My piggy bank from very heavy
i ask 2 precious to drop the coin in since i start to work..
It should be heavy
but when i want to take the coins out
so we can enjoy for this fews day at my parents house
took out and left a few coins..

Did mention to their father is for the children
Gambler is really scary
My friends say
Don't know when he will sell the two adorable children away..

Heart had prepared to get the worst things from them..
Sell the house
NO way
why u dun sell ur house to help ur son..
A shameless man after all..

不要担心,过去就把 他他忘记..

把孩子照顾好
是我先在要做好
做工赚钱
还我的债...
开开心心爱我的每一天....

谢谢朋友的关心
每个人的鼓励
我会加油的....

明天回跟好.....=)

My precious 2nd birthday

Happy birthday to my precious mikkiel =)

Happy 2nd birthday to my precious mikkiel

we play the whole afternoon after their half day school....
Precious was so happy when i help him light up the candles
He knew was his birthday
He was very happy..=)

Lug him and baobei so much =)

Is the end

I had been sick for weeks
why
On 2 december my house door was splash by paint early in the morning...
I was so so so so so so SHOCKED
when the childrens' father
wake me up
telling me the door was splash by paint..
WHO DONE
of course the same people
who telling story..

The whole day i smell the thinner and paint and when i saw him
i (&*^&%^&^*(&()*) him and i ask him to go out of the house..
YES HE DID
AND SMS ME THAT HE DOESN"T WANT TO DRAG ME AND THE CHILDREN..
BULLSHIT
IF HE DOESN"T WANT TO DRAG US
WHY MUST HE LEAVE
FIND US A HOME AND LET 3 of us to stay
and
he can do whatever he wants..

His mother called me and called and ask me to give him a last chance
last chance
last chance
and
friends advice me think of the 2 children..
LET HIM IN TO THE HOUSE AGAIN

Last week I find out he go borrow private loaner
and than he told me he doesn't want to tell me
cos he doesn't want me to stress.
OF COS HE SAY LIKE THIS
cos he claimed he brought the money back for
children stuff
and i was suspecting when did he bought money back
and i was borrowing money from friends.
YESH HE DID BRING BACK
50 to 100 bucks only..
Keep telling me he brought the money back
AGAIN
HE IS LIE-ing
HE gamble and lose dun know how much
and
I had telling him and warn him not to gamble
..
HIS WONDERFUL LIES
and again plead for forgiveness

think i am brainless
i areadi suspect he is telling lies
all this while he is having debt for is gamble
and my debt from my friend is for family expenses
the problem is
HE CANNOT COMPROMISED
he lies is following one by one
end up
i really cannot stand it
I am sick cos i was actually sick
start on 2 december
got headache ,low pressure , vomit..
As a woman who can take it..
He never think of me
i actually used to it
but he never ever think of 2 precious at all
...

Chances by chances
for what..

Kids sick ask me to wait
I sick call my mum to bring me to see doctor when
he can tell my mum he has no money to bring him see doctor..
I admit i ask him to do so
But he knew my mum is going to have a operation
I ask him not to help his bro
not to gamble
but after all he did what he shouldn't did..

He can tell me he going to crazy cos he have to find money to clear his debt per week..
I admit hospital is was not the one who pay the bills..
I say i going crazy
he will say the say things as me..
So after all he is still the same a outsider
SELFISH...

I will never help him in his debt
NEVER
A CENT ALSO NO..

Chased him out today and i think this time round who ask me to ask him back i will never again..
He had been getting worse to worst..
Also love to compare with his friend
(sorry not the good ones
is the worst ones..)
I am still on the way of getting well
today christmas
staying at home
and cos of him we have to stay at home
we cannot go out..
COS HE SAY HE IS FINDING MONEY
SO I LET HIM GO FIND
FROM MONDAY TILL NOW
HE CANNOT NOT EVEN FIND TILL HOW MUCH..
Money not the problem
is his character
really sound scary

He even want me to sell the house
and telling me all sort of reason
when i ask him to transfer his shares of this house
to me ALL
So he went to HDB and than tell me
we can get a new house
so can change environment and than
HE CAN CLEAR HIS DEBT..
Luckily i have friends
i told them what he did and they say
DUN BE STUPID TO SELL THE HOUSE
WHERE U GOING TO STAY WITH UR KIDS..
Cos i have not so much free time like him
can dun need to work..
I sick i still drag myself to work
just for my 2 precious and me..


Gambler words cannot be believe..
I learn my lesson
this family is his hand who ruined
telling me
how noble he is
i feel like vomit luckily i never give him to much hopes
just that what he and his family did
really make me feel
very sick n tired

A family can be SO united in this way
i happy for them
just see when than their 2 precious will learn from mistake..
selfish
covering mistake
lies
gambler

Own self do
own self suffer
but than he
make the 3 of us suffer..

His precious sarah is having fever yesterday
he can sleep so well that when
sarah was saying she having stomachache
he still can sleep with snore...

Want to go crazy
go and be crazy
People do what u also want to do what
The very good things of his is
he can let people suffer what he does
and when he suffer he say he going crazy...

whatever doesn't want to curse him
dun worth me to had any memories good..

Nothing good to treasure this father of 2 precious
I really feel very sad of
doing this decision
cos i dun know how 2 precious will feel
went they saw people have a family of
father mother and children
and
they are different..

I dun need to think of my feeling
but
i have to think of my 2 preicous
feeling and thought.
Anyway i had tried my best
he dun give a damn of my 2 precious safety why should i care..
I have to force myself to recover as soon as possible
i dun think i want him to come home and help me with the children
if i cannot i rather put them by my sides
rather them always coming back
sick or wounds here and there..

Sick is very common
Wounds here and there never
ask never say
than end up sick
cos wound never clean properly..
I understand that is very common
but than have to be responsible to say
and do the necessary things will not go worst

Is always like this not family problem
than this type of money and gamble problem
if not is harming each other
and than let people suffer

i not going to bother their family anymore
not necessary anymore
I have more to bother
I have my future to plan
dun ever think of selling this house
I will never sell if
u can find me a new ones
and i will do the rest myself..

The recent me
(sibei 'cui' face)

I know i shouldn't grumble at this time and this day
BUT I DON"T CARE...

Have been sick for a few weeks(uncountable)
Thanks colleagues and friends
who care n concern
and the sms,calls and even visit-ing me a few time a weeks..
Since i am waiting for my time to eat medicine
I shall start a bit on what had happen recently
THIS WORLD REALLY HAVE
THOSE PEOPLE ACTS IN THE DRAMA,
REALLY APPEAR IN MY OWN LIFE..
Cannot really lend a hand to help people
(i know i am very busybody)
When they are alright
they can do anything
and
say anything they want or like..

Even if i am not in the picture
they drag me in the picture
and end up realised
Oh
to this people
'I am a person like that'

I had really dun know
i am puzzled
but this few weeks
I had enough more to struggle
so to that problem
is just let me see how PEOPLE is react-ing..

I love to act
I love to spread
I Love to whatever

I dun need everyone know
what is happening
cos
as long as
i know myself
understand a person is not diffcult
but when understand a person who change like a demon
really very scary..

Better curse me MORE
I really get used to the expect happening problem
BUT IS TOO MUCH
TOO MANY...

This few weeks many things happen too many things
人心真的很难侧...
If i don't have people who keep advice
and help me in any ways
I will not be here to grumble so much..
I am gone crazy and in IMH
or even in the hell..

I always think of others
But than what is happen-ing NOW
is not what i can control...
Feel really depressed when this happen to me
IS TOO SUDDEN...
I know i have to be strong
But
i have the heart to do so
But but body is the important part i can take it anot
Once collasped
I think hard to get back..
(THOSE WHO CURSED ME WILL FEEL VERY HAPPY
I AM IN THIS STAGE NOW
LAUGH AS U CAN)
GO AHEAD AND LAUGH

I know myself
2 precious need me
i also need them..
I am trying hard to get back myself
try not to think much
work as i can
be a good mummy as i could
i cannot promise anymore
I REALLY REALLY TRY ..

GAMBLER ALWAYS ONLY THINK EVERYTHING NOT ENOUGH
LIAR ALWAYS LIE WHEN IT COME TO A HABIT
DUN REGRET WHEN WHAT U HAD DONE
BUT U MIGHT AREADI AREADI
AFFECT PEOPLE LIFE??
WHO DOESN"T KNOW LIFE IS IMPORTANT
FIGHT FOR UR LOVED ONES
EVEN U HAD ONLY LEFT ONLY A BREATHE..

I doesn't want to hear or see any tragic things happen anymore
I told myself i must choose to be more selfish n
I will never gain i only get PAIN..

To THE PERSON WHO CONCERN

On 18th December i suddenly received a sms saying that i am misunderstanding HER when i am laying on my bed and i am not feeling well...

(Claim that what she wrote on her facebook status that claim not saying me and him...)

whatever i never ever make any big fuss on it at all i know she is saying about me and him when he told me when he saw this status on his facebook account..He claims that he saying about HIM but than i feel i am dragging in after i saw that word FAMILY MEMBER and ZI DAO ZI YEN..(didn't not come back for days)

I really feel that i have to put it here since she claim to say she is very innocent

On 17th December one of my gf calling me and was in a conversation,and was talking for a while and ask about do we going out together with her and so also mention this person who write on that status so the problem is about him and his husband why consider about we two..
(when i was bring sarah to school for camping)

So a friend also claim that is saying about HIM and if He had mistaken her to write this in her facebook
what did i do anything ????? Lata on i knew him had somehow say something to his husband dun really know what detail and somehow at middle of late night i receiving a few sms when i was having my rest and medicine on me for days...

Who is going to spread the news about this STATUS thingy to who ,NEWSPAPER OR ADVERTISEMENT..
WHATEVER is you claim you are so INNOCENT putting somewhere and really look like u are very innocent at all..


Because of so many misunderstanding so i delete of the fb account so no more misunderstand anymore...

First of all i didn't do anything to this STATUS i also dun want to get involve in anything about HIM..Instead who doesn't know our relationship is in what STATUS..I just don't want to get drag in in any of HIS PROBLEM OR MONEY MATTERS..

Whatever if you would see me like that in this character what for to be friend,i am so fcuked up than dun need to come explaining ....

Wendy 's precious

Wendy's precious Xavier

Congrates to my buddy Wendy ,
Xavier had come to world on 17.12.2010
Will update more when i feel much better...

明天我的病会好吗!!!!!

My sick face (pale right)

Had been laying on the bed for 2 days ,still dizzy and headache..Had been days was miss-ing my 2 precious,i just want to be fully recover and bring them back...Teacher call me to inform me tomorrow day will be a camping so decided to let sarah goes to have FUN staying for a night in school..I hope she will have fun with her classmate n teacher.....

This 2 days rest at home,have some catch up with some friends who calls n concern...Although feel so sick but after listening to some friends who very long never catch up is also good thingy when sick..I was busy working although there is so many things happening things around me..My fault My problem My retribution or My life whatever..Luckily I had nice friends and relatives around although this time round i didn't let my parent know about it cos mummy is sick might going to operation and i know that my father still cannot get away about my grandma has left us..As a daughter how can i let them to worry about me===> Take so many medicine a day make me feel like vomit..

Yesterday was chatting with friend and they share their problem..Didn't really advice much cos brain not working well... Dun understand why their is people love to be say someone that their self was also doing the same things that someone is doing..Human MOUTH is the most poison things in this world..Especially those who loved to anyhow say and cause FRIENDS ,COUPLES and FAMILY to quarrel and even end up making them fight or ++++ because of the mouth of human...Came across alot of this kind of people lately this few years, didn't really know who is fake and real....Luckily my six sense will quite accurate when i never ki siao..I also hope everyone will get their happiness..I also will happy for them =) I never met a ridiculous people who so unreasonable and put blame to people and anyhow say and take people for advantages..

Dun need to bully the innocent
Dun need to attack the innocent
Dun need to tell everyone how bad how good u are,People got their OWN EYES TO SEE

whatever

A stranger stabs you in the front, a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, an enemy stabs you in the back but REAL friends don't carry knives!

I would love to treasure every little friendship of mine..If i 10 out 9 say u have to give up why must u want to keep this type of friend when problem come she find you when problem goes she back stab you..As long she can get her happiness i will be happy even she want to blame me for everything as long as my conscience is clear I am really clear..

Learn my lesson will never repeat the same mistake...Tomorrow will be abetter day..=) I will not get worse for what i update just that have to remind myself what i had gone through is just a stage of life...

IRresponsible people irresponsible ACTs..

I miss my 2 precious so much
Went to hospital yesterday
I feel so sick and headache
Nearly fainted when i was way out of the workplace
Thank god someone give me alending hand....

All because of everything
My parent,relatives, friend and everyone who loved and care about me
i cannot lay down i cannot break down
I must be strong
But i think a long time to get back myself
I really sick ,my hand is swollen PAIN
thank for the care n concern everyone
i will be away for awhile
to adjust my feeling
my everythings
Have not been sleep well everyday
The same things i had occur
since last year
THANK FOR EVERYTHING


I hope my parent will be doing well
I hope i can see my 2 precious everyday
I cannot take care myself
I need someone to bring me to here and there now
I need someone to feed me
I need someone to take care of me...

报仇心态

Yesterday night watch this drama 镜中人 till 2 am.From episode 17 till 20 the final episode..I had been watching this drama since mob-tv have it..This drama was appearing in channel 8 @ april 2005 i wondering why i never listen to my friend telling me about this drama.Finally realized why i never watch this drama before...

Work work work...aLamak 2 precious fees is increasing $80 each..........Mummy going operation cos she is having 骨刺....Hope she will be fine soon..Hope next year onwards everything will be fine =)
Gotta rest for awhile n go take my 2 precious back home from school....

快乐星期天

Today morning ,wake up and saw my hp got 3 missed call from shiyim..Luckily i wake up orelse i dun think i was be see-ing her & Caen.Caen was so sweet and cute with her lovely boots.Didn't take any photo .(went down forget to bring my hp too).Since last month we went out so fast can see each other again..One of her friend will be living very near me..So i think if she come over to look for her friends we also can meet up also...So happy till follow her down to her friend house my hair like LION KING and didn't brush my teeth lol i was still half wake half asleep heehee =)

Was a great sunday morning =)

My 2 precious was still sleeping,so finish up my post and my task had done
Waiting for them to wake up

Tomorrow going back to work as usual...
Xmas is coming
hope tomorrow buy TOTO can
HUAT AR
Clear my debts and bills
(Dreaming again)
No choice
有买一点点有希望....

感恩= 开心

Work,work ,work.....Had been a week resting at home,Done my housechores and clean here and there although leg still pain at times..I feel that alot of things had happen this few month,if u always read my blog u will know very clearly what exactly happen..I dun feel repeating and repeating anymore...Whatever just like my headline===>感恩= 开心...u dun feel happy if u dun even know how to be grateful...

there comes a time in your life where u have to step back and take a look at everyone around u and think,"are they worth all that they are putting u through?" I hope this quote helps u c things better.

Rabbit year 2011
Have to write the GOAL n AIM
and
Hope can fulfill it..

this year
BAD
But i met alot of wonderful people
and
I am very 2 感恩 =)

My first Dinner n Dance

Dinner N Dance 2010

My outfit for DND
(Belt that i bought for years)
Dig out and put it on
Someone say i look like very RETRO lol

My D-I-Y NAIL
(last minute wash and apply the blue instead
i apply too thick le)

tada my blue NAIL
(love this colour very much)

The scenery view when i was siting in the cab
MBS
I want to go go go...
I put the fake eyelashes on myself...
(not very good but still can tahan for the whole day for dropping)


Reach the venue waiting for friends to come so
went in to the suntec convection hall
the sweet in everyone table
(nice and i like so much)
This is one of the performance
that i enough so much
this ang mo i call him
阿万(in hokkien)
He know how to sing alot of languages song
Hokkien,Cantonese,Chinese n more
Tamil,malay..


follow by lucky draw and uniform contest
-
-
-
-

i saw vampire outfit too..
alot some even wear army outfit..
.
.
.
.
.
.

MBS again
At night view the scenery was so nice
I want to go one day
one fine day
and
i realised i alot of places in singapore
still haven't go yet
New shopping mall
Universal studios
and etc...
Too many to mention..

Enjoy that days =)

This morning my precious really scared me,he was shaking like a vibrator and i torch his forehand he want not having fever..Wake myself up and make milk for him thought he is hungry but than he spill the milk on my bed and than still shaking...Switch on the LIGHT and i saw him very very uncomfortable i know is FITS but than many many ?????? was in my brain coming out..WHY WHY WHY LIKE THAT..Faster bring sarah to school and wanted to bring him to kkh...Luckily i gave medicine before we go out,his fever is subsidize and i came back to do some research when he was asleep...I bring him to the nearby clinic and see the photo below: precious totally no longer active and he is really SICK...



Yesterday night precious was still alright but than this morning really really really shocked me half died...I saw his father having fit when he is having a very very high fever and we have a BIG QUARREL...Luckily now he is alright...OR else i will really dun know want to do...He is running here and there and active MIKKIEL IS BACK..NO joking when kids is sick parent was the one who worry..

Pity me headache lay on the bed...See my eye one big one small can buy 4 d liao...haha

After so many many 风风雨雨,
now is abit 雨过天晴,
but still the same
$$$$$ is always not enough
must really 省省吃俭用...

2 precious school fees,house bills and of course my debts...
Life have to still go on
no matter how...

Some web cam photo from this few month,
i realise my hair had been blacky for this few month
but drop colour areadi..
Give a damn wait till
i finish my debt than will
go make myself better..

Everything now for myself is DIY..
Paint my nail when i feel to do so
Cut my fringe when i feel like to long for me
but at the moment i want to let my fringe
to be long..
Alittle sick of my bangs liao..
I hope i can change my little hair style
change always the same..
Now only can dream a little
Hope i can have some luck on
TOTO..
So i can return my debt and everything
and i can enjoy with my 2 precious..
I know i am dreaming..
GtG my feet is now better but still piggy feet x 2...

Wondering why i love to open my mouth big and smile like my eye cannot be seen..
when i take photo nowadays
someone mention it and i realise
but anyway
is me la..
bo bian new pattern for taking photo ma..